My job essentially is thinking up goofy shit (fart noises)
So, I think up the goofy shit and come on the weekends and report it to you

You don't wanna be around when the iron bends
Fuck around and wind up a lamb in the lion's den
We throw the rosemary sprigs straight on the coals
Got the mint jelly on the plate with the rolls
In this bitch with a leopard print bindlestiff
Ball out with my balls out till I'm penniless
Pants in the dryer, chicken in the crock pot
Time bomb strategically placed in the lock box
Boredom be a fat chance, posted in my rap stance
Throw an 1/8 on the plate, mexican hat dance
I nerd out with my bird out, throw your herbs out
The feral ginger lurkin outside the bird house
Y'all motherfuckers throw your forks up
You know there ain't no shortcuts when I slow and low that pork butt
I'm always on time, yes I rock thorough
Me and Gerard Germaine down at Rimerock Borough
We ain't no hot boys that love to talk noise
Got the stir fry for your 3rd eye with the bok choy
Bust out my secret automatic private dictionary
Shit is scary when I'm mixin berries with the pitted cherries
Reefy leafy dutch, ornery enough to make a preacher cuss
Keep my tosie wosies cozy in the sneaker guts
Too silly with them loose Phillies
Sorry you doggy dined on my dong bag
E Wayne and Bruce Villy

That's disgusting, that's terrible
You kiss your mother with that mouth?
You eat with that mouth?
Garbage mouth!!
Garbage mouth, toilet tongue, sewer mouth...

Backwoods and Beaujolais
I rap good, so they say
Crafting masterpieces while you're churning out throwaways
Earning clout multiple ways, fuck what you say
I'll climb that mountain in a couple of days
Drunk up in the function and I'm hittin the blunts
You might learn something if you'd listen for once
Try to tell the tale of ridiculous stunts, but yo
That story's stale and that kid is a dunce
Our words'll make 'em nervous while we're dining full service
They're verses serve no purpose, so its time to pull curtains
B Rude lurkin, lookin like the Leprechaun King
All bets are gone, snackin on the Szechuan wings
What else she gon bring? Biscuits fillin the bag
With a pen and a pad down on Venable Ave.
Not a cynical lad, actually quite the optimist
Twice as confident, gold lining my esophagus
Tonight we're rockin it
Empty Glass, on and poppin bitch
No stoppin this, coaching this game longer than Popovic
Off a 1/5 and we're clownin like Homie
Listened to your song and I found it quite phony
That's why we don't play that
Don't frown like you know me
I'll be in the way back while I down my Negroni
Call it 5 star, but it's brown Rice-a-Roni
You sound like a Brony
Downright Baloney